Day after Thanksgiving

Well, this post was going to be a real bitch-fest. I am feeling less then grateful these days. More like George Baily before Clarence came along. I miss my best friend Vonda, I am still grieving over my son's loss of hearing, and I feel taken for granted by people who tell me they love me. So this was to be my anti-establishment day after blog--- but then.....

But then, before I wrote anything, I read Sling's latest entry. After that, I realized if I look at the big picture I can find a few things to be thankful for.

I will not get polio, and more than likely neither will my kids.

Today, no one in this home will go hungry.

Both of my parents, as fucked up as they are, are still alive.

My son and my daughter are both alive. They can feed themselves. They can walk.

My children live in a world where they do not need to sell themselves for food or safety. They can go outside with a reasonable sense of security. It is very unlikely that a gunman will take over our neighborhood or bomb our home today.

Today the government will not break down my door because of my political views or because of what I write.

My daughter can cover her head if she wants to--- but it is not required by law that she does. And she can talk to anyone she wants to -- boy or girl --- and she can learn to read and write with out fear.

And my kids can read what ever they want!!! Vampires, religion, death, birth, sex. Very few books have actually ever been banned by our government. I think there is an anarchist book and a hit man book-- but really, if my kids wanted those they could get them. I know many schools, local library's, or churches may ban books-- but at least not too many by our government, not today! This of course then extends itself to other forms of art--- print, paintings, music!!!!

And they can love who they want, maybe that wont always be a positive thing from a mom's perspective, but they can marry outside of their faith, class, national origin, race, or sex if they so choose.

My son helped me with a extremely important Thanksgiving tradition. The Lasagna. Please be sure to notice it is made in a turkey roasting pan! I dont think I could cook it in a regular pan if I tried.

My family has made lasagna like this for over 60 years... no shit! I guess they made so much because they always had so many people to feed. We always had room for one more-- no matter how many more there were.
The first time I helped my grandfather with the meal preparation was when I was a freshman, just like my son! And my son was the one who offered to help, just like I did back in the day.

It was very exciting for me. Back in 1981 I changed the old family recipe. I took the sausage out of the casing a cooked it, rather than cooking it and slicing it. My grandfather just grunted when I did it, but he made it that way forever after.

(No, it is not the same if you buy it in bulk, for some reason it just doesn't have enough fat in it that way).








So even though my heart is very hard and the weigh of my little world seem greater then any I have ever know, I still can find things to be thankful for, if not for myself, at least for those two souls I have been entrusted with.

Now don't laugh too hard at the picture --- okay go ahead and laugh, I did.